For a long time, I thought what I was feeling was a fear of abandonment.
But recently I realised it might be something slightly different.
Maybe I have been trying to protect the love that I have.
Love feels precious. When something feels precious, the instinct is to protect it. To hold onto it tightly so it doesn’t disappear. To make sure you don’t lose it.
But love has something unusual about it. It behaves less like something we can store safely, and more like a small bird that chooses where to land.
You can care for it.
You can create a safe place for it.
But you cannot force it to stay.
And maybe that is why love can feel both beautiful and terrifying at the same time.
Sometimes my mind fills with fears.
What if something happens and I lose him?
What if he meets someone more attractive than me?
And if I’m being honest, life is unpredictable.
He may meet someone more attractive.
Maybe she’s more intelligent.
Maybe she’s funnier, more interesting, or more accomplished.
All of those things are possible.
But then I ask myself a much simpler question: who has he chosen today?
If the answer is me, then maybe the wiser thing to do is not to live inside imagined futures, but to appreciate the love that exists today.
Maybe love isn’t something we secure forever.
Maybe it is more like a bird that rests in our hands for a while. We care for it, we make space for it, and we appreciate its presence.
We cannot control where it might fly tomorrow.
But today, it has chosen to land here, and maybe that's all that matters.
